If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize