Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize