Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize