Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
