I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
