and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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