i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
