Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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