So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
