Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
