The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
