it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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