love makes seman taste better
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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