Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
