brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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