She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize