A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
