Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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