And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
My bed smells like the plague
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
