I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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