Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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