I cockslap morals
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
