It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Sober January is a disaster.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
