she was so not down for the gang bang
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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