if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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