It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize
