he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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