i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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