the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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