So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
You are a genius and a whore.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
