I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I think your dad took our porno
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
