And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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