Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize