you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize