I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
