If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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