I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
