i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
