i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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