Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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