Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
