Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
