I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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