I'm eating all of the evidence.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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