Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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