i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
