didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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