Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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