R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
