Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
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