Got a toothbrush?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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